The NY Post-Op Lobotomy Program is a pharmacological fictitious therapy, for whatever ails ya.
There’s plenty of powerful toxins that effect us in our day to day travels that you probably aren’t even aware of, could be an advertisement on the radio or a poster in the subway that’s got you feeling down. For instance “do you have embarrassing freckles? well ask your doctor about prescription Zylocore, get back the confidence you deserve and rid yourself of unsightly freckles” side effects may include nose growth, crotch burn, itchyosis, loss of awesomeness, battered woman and or man syndrome, perpetual nightmares accompanied by refluxing toe cheese, extreme ankle hair growth, hyper mega depression, increased likeliness of chronic death. By taking Zylocore you agree to accept responsibility for all of the preceding conditions and impending doom.
Have you ever read the NY Post? How did you feel afterward? You may not have realized it, but you just had a lobotomy. I have a secret weapon, I wear a tin foil hat when I read the NY Post. My tin foil hat allows me to safely see deep inside the infected pulp of the pages without risk. I’ll diagnose the dangerous material from the NY Post, analyze it and comment on it. I will restore your frontal lobe and re-spin the yarn before I stitch you back up with it. You’ll feel better about it all when you listen to the NY Post-Op Lobotomy Program from the comfort of your own skull without all the service interruptions.